MY STORY
Before the realization
The beginning of my journey
Seventeen years ago, I had just become a mother, and I was walking with my son in the stroller when a car came at us, traveling at high speed. The driver lost control of the vehicle and drove up on the sidewalk, where it hit my baby and me, and then the driver just turned the car and drove off.
My son was only three weeks old at the time, and this was my first time taking a walk with him alone. When the car hit us, he flew out of the stroller, which was destroyed, and landed on the ground a few meters away. Since I was also struck by the car, I was lying on the ground for a few seconds before I got up and ran to the stroller, only to realize that my son wasn’t there.
My spiritual awakening
A few months after the trauma, I started Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, and a while later, I found my first spiritual book, A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle. That book became the entry point into a path of spiritual transformation and the beginning of the end of an old identity.
The book opened me up to a new reality. While reading it, I realized that my thoughts were not just thoughts, as I had learned previously in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. There was also a thought-based identity existing inside me, pretending to be me: the ego.
I learned that the ego is our unobserved mind and our unobserved emotions, and that all humans live with this kind of identity and dysfunctional thinking until we awaken spiritually and free ourselves. I also learned that this is a state of consciousness that has been and still is, the dominant state in humanity.
As I was reading the book, I could recognize the ego in myself. I also became aware of stillness or space beyond my thoughts, which opened me to a larger and more peaceful reality beyond the mind. There was a profound recognition of truth in what I was reading, and with that recognition came lightness and inner peace.
In the years that followed, I read a lot of spiritual books and listened to many different spiritual teachers. Later, I also went to retreats and talks with Eckhart Tolle, and started practicing meditation and practiced being present in my life. As a result, I learned to see many of my thinking, feeling, and acting patterns that were part of my ego identity, and I could see through them and let many of them go.
But the years that followed reading A New Earth were not precisely peaceful in how I had experienced the first days and weeks. Some difficult events happened in my life, and had I not had my spiritual practice, some of them would have been a lot bear.
But since I had my practice, I allowed what happened to take me deeper. I let the events take me directly into the pain and grief I felt, instead of thinking about them and going into the reactions my body and nervous system were screaming at me to go into. So instead of running away, I faced what was happening inside me without any escape.
Gradually, I built an inner strength that enabled me to stay even with challenging emotions and amid challenging circumstances.
The difficult events made me even more aware of what was happening inside me as they were occurring, and as a result, they took me deeper and sped up my spiritual journey. They also led me away from what was no longer working in my life and into new circumstances.
All I have to do is be who I am
Eight years into my journey, I went through an inner shift that became the end of my spiritual path as I knew it and the beginning of something new.
I was still on my spiritual path when I had an epiphany: ”All I have to do is be who I am.”
This simple yet profound realization was a shift in consciousness. It was a shift in perception that was irreversible and happened instantly.
I had been looking for spiritual enlightenment and what I found was my true self.
The process that followed the realization
So, eight years after the trauma that began my spiritual journey, I had an experience that once again changed my life at the core.
I experienced self-realization, a permanent shift in consciousness where I realized who I am, my true self. At that moment, I also saw through the illusion of my old identity, the ego, and the identification with that old identity fell away.
The realization happened in an instant, and in that instant, my true self replaced the ego internally.
But it took years to integrate and make that inner shift a reality in the physical world. So, it wasn’t the end of my journey.
Before the realization, I had had many realizations and insights on my spiritual journey. They contributed to my understanding of life, consciousness, the ego, and the spiritual path I was on.
But, the realization of my true self was not another insight to add to my former understanding of life or another step on my path. On the contrary, it wiped out my path and everything I had known until that moment. Because what I experienced now was a different state of consciousness. I had to reorient myself to a new reality, which was not available to me on the outside.
The realization also began an intense process where the old identity’s layers were falling away. I quit my job and spent a year focusing on the inner shift, and that year I went very deep into my inner world. I had done a lot of inner work for the past eight years, but this was different. Now, the foundation of the old identity was beginning to surface and come into my awareness.
During this time, I became intimately familiar with the places inside myself I had been closing off and running from without knowing it. Old beliefs, experiences, and traumas were beginning to come up to the surface. They had been hidden deep in my subconscious. And while there, they had been working as aspects or building blocks of the old identity. But as they began to come into my awareness, I could gradually process, heal, and let them go.
As I did, I was removing the foundation of the old identity and the old conditioning, and the changes in my inner world were followed by changes in the outer world.
In the years after the realization, I cleaned out almost my entire old life, in both my inner and outer worlds. I experienced a lot of uncertainty and temporary circumstances in many areas of my life during those years, which was difficult, even though I had my inner certainty.
During that time, I also started to open up more to new ways of receiving information from beyond the mind, such as mystical experiences and new dimensions, heightened intuition, and guidance.
I was also on my twin flame journey (you can read about my twin flame journey here). I had met my twin flame about ten months before the realization.
After a few years of cleaning out the old conditioning, the energy shifted, and something new began to emerge more clearly from beyond what I had been letting go of.
Behind what I removed, the true me and a new state of consciousness were emerging, and as the process continued, my true self began to replace the old ego identity in all areas of my life, and life was asking me to start anew.
My spiritual teaching and upcoming book also began to form as the new consciousness started to come forth and a vision for a new humanity and paradigm began to reveal itself from within.
Stepping into who I have become
The next step on my journey is to share my work the way I do on this platform and in my upcoming book.
My work is the result of my journey. It is my experience from 17 years condensed into a book and teachings, and I have created a process that helps you go through a similar journey.
I look forward to sharing my work and vision for the new humanity and paradigm with you!
I also look forward to seeing the awakening of humanity blossom in the years ahead, as we evolve from the old to the new consciousness, and being part of that process.
After the realization
More about me
Professional and educational background
Before I decided to focus entirely on this work and leave my old professional life behind, I was working in Communications.
I have worked for both large and smaller organizations and companies and led several projects – for example, brand work and strategic development. I have also worked with communication strategy for social media, websites, and other projects.
I have also written articles and worked with content for different media channels, such as websites, newsletters, magazines, ads, and social media.
I have a Bachelor’s degree in Media and Communication studies. After receiving my Bachelor’s degree, I also studied Religion, Sociology, Gender studies, and Swedish at the university.
I have also taken classes in Marketing, Leadership, and Business Development.